When I first considered attempting a professional writing career, I remember thinking, “I received As on my high school and college writing papers. How much harder could it be to write for the professional market?” I soon learned the answer to that question. While a solid foundation in high school and college writing classes will be of tremendous benefit to a person approaching the professional writing arena, editors at magazines, newspapers and publishing houses require their writers to meet a higher standard.

As I embarked on my mission to publish, I discovered five key areas in which professional writing differed from school standards. After learning to spot these mistakes in my own writing, I noticed other beginning writers struggling with the same issues. By identifying these common weaknesses in your writing and learning ways to improve, you will craft stronger manuscripts and improve the chances of publishing your work.

1. Passive verbs:
When I joined my first critique group in March 2002, my crit partners kindly pointed out that my verbs were passive. Passive? As opposed to militant? What does that mean? I wondered. Passive verbs, forms of the verb to be, convey a state of being, while active verbs exhibit action and energy. When writing, active is better! For example:

It was a sunny day. They had a picnic beneath an oak tree.

Each sentence contains a passive verb (in bold). While these sentences describe the setting and activity, they tell the reader about the scene rather than allowing him to experience it with the characters. The passive verbs are mostly to blame. They don’t activate the senses and conjure vivid pictures that titillate a reader’s imagination. Let’s replace the passive verbs and add some description.

Bright rays of sunshine filtered through the oak’s green canopy, laying a dappled pattern of light across the picnic blanket.

Can you picture this inviting setting more clearly? Why? Because the verbs paint a vivid picture in the reader’s mind. The three key elements from the first example—sun, picnic, and oak—have been retained, however, the active verbs and descriptive phrases make the setting come alive.

A form of the to be verb paired with by is another common passive. For example:

The child was run over by a car.

Here, the car is performing the action and the child is being acted upon. The sentence is stronger if the object performing the action is placed at the beginning of the sentence like this:

The car ran over the child.

The revised sentence is shorter and more active. A shorter sentence with a stronger verb creates a greater impact on the reader. Here’s two more:

The president was impeached by Congress. versus Congress impeached the president.

The bank was robbed by an armed gunman. versus An armed gunman robbed the bank.

When editing, I look for forms of to be and determine whether they could be replaced with an active verb. You can’t rewrite them all, but in many instances you will find stronger replacements for your passive verbs.
Forms of to be:

am
is
are
was
were
be
being
been

2. Lazy words:
When a writer puts words to paper, his or her speaking habits inevitably influence the writing voice. Your personality will come through in your writing, however, you don’t want your lazy speech habits to translate onto paper. Here are some common lazyisms to edit out of your writing:

* that—This pesky little word makes frequent appearances. When you see “that” in your writing, read the sentence again, omitting the word. Does it make sense without “that”? If so, hit delete. I find only one in ten “thats” are necessary.

* just—I heard Robin Lee Hatcher speak at a national writing conference. When asked about her editing habits, she stated she overuses the word “just” and must edit it from her manuscript. I went home and looked at one of my novels, and “just” was everywhere. Fire up the delete key and eliminate it.

* get/got—These are lazy verbs used often in conversation, but they should be replaced with stronger verbs in our writing. He got in the boat becomes He climbed into the boat and She got a new car becomes She purchased a new car. You can make exceptions to the get/got rule when writing dialogue. You want your characters to sound natural, so including a few “gets” is acceptable between quotation marks.

* over—Here in the Midwest, people overuse the word “over.” If I’m not careful, I end up with a few in every paragraph. When editing, I watch for this pesky preposition and rewrite a large portion of them.

* very, really, a lot—It was very hot. How hot is “very”? What seems hot to someone in Alaska may be normal for someone living on the equator. Be more specific, using concrete descriptions rather than opting for one of these lazy words.

* thing—This vague word drains impact from your sentences. Rewrite, replacing “thing” with a more specific noun. Sometimes the word “it” is similarly vague.

3. Unnecessary words:
Editors like tight, concise sentences. When word count or column space is limited, a writer must eliminate extra words, delivering maximum meaning in minimum space. Here’s a few tips to help you transform rambling sentences and wordy phrases into powerful paragraphs.

I thought maybe we might go to the nursing home.

Maybe and might both serve the same purpose in this sentence, so one could easily be removed without detracting from the meaning of the sentence.

Do you think you might be able to go to the store for me?

Obviously, I’ve exaggerated this example, but even the best writer pens a sentence like this one from time to time. Here’s a clue: Watch for sentences containing three or more short words in succession. Short word clusters usually indicate a wordy sentence, which can be reduced.

Will you go to the store for me?

Sometimes, you can replace three or four words with one more concise term:

She took money out of her account.
becomes
She withdrew money from her account.

His aunt will be coming back home on Friday.
becomes
His aunt returns home on Friday.

When writing or editing, you want to make every word count. By eliminating weak or unnecessary words and phrases, you will strengthen your story or article and make those sentences shine.

4. Repeated words or phrases:

She leaned back against the back of the chair, taking some pressure off her back.

In this sentence the word “back” appears three times, each in a different context. Repetition is distracting to the reader and should be avoided. When editing, look for repeated words and phrases. Rewrite to eliminate them.

Here’s another common repetition error:

In the first inning, the batter hit one out of the park in the first inning.

Notice the bolded phrase is used twice. This mistake usually occurs when the sentence is lengthy, putting the beginning phrase far enough away from the end to easily overlook the repetition.

5. Adverbs:
Stephen King said, “The road to hell is paved with adverbs.” While my aversion to adverbs does not match Mr. King’s in intensity, I agree beginning writers overuse them, particularly those of the –ly persuasion. Adverbs ending in –ly often indicate the writer has used a weak verb. By substituting a stronger verb, the writer can eliminate the need for an –ly adverb. For example:

He walked quickly.
Replace with:
He hurried. He rushed. or He scrambled.

He eyed her lustily.
Replace with:
He leered. or He ogled.

The rewritten sentences are more concise and, in my opinion, convey a more vivid image. Watch for –ly words and attempt to rewrite the sentence, using a stronger verb.

After you edit these five mistakes from your manuscripts, what remains is a well-written, easy-to-read piece that will appeal to both editors and readers. So, arm yourself with this list and tackle the editing process with enthusiasm. I guarantee you will appreciate the results.